A Mess of Greens: Wood Nettles in May

My dad says “a mess of greens.”

Actually, he says “a mess-a greens,” but regardless.

When he says it, he means turnip or mustard greens.

Could be green beans, too. Or, oddly enough, fish. A mess of fish is a a good haul, plenty for everyone.

I’m not sure why greens, green beans, and fish come in this particular Appalachian measure. We never seem to have a mess of carrots, or a mess of bacon.

Maybe other people have their own foods that qualify for a “mess,” but these seem to be ours.

Last week, Lance and I decided we needed a mess of greens and headed down into the slough to one of our wood nettle patches. We carried our foraging baskets, gloves, and kitchen scissors. You don’t want bare skin around these plants, but once they’re lightly cooked, you’d never know they had such fierce little stinging hairs. They turn tender, delicate, and delicious.

A small note about my winter gloves in the photo: despite it being May, it was cold enough for me to be in a hoodie, wool hat, and gloves, while Lance — who is always colder than I am — wore his winter coat. Since I was the designated nettle handler, I also had big leather work gloves pulled over my winter ones.

As you can see, we did in fact come home with a mess of greens.

I cooked them up with half an onion, a little butter, and a bit of garlic.

Can’t beat a good mess-a greens.